Most everyone knows this by now but this last month or so has been extremely exciting for us because Travis has finally moved home! After 15 months of only seeing each other on the weekend or every other weekend, we have wanted nothing more than to be in the same city. We are so excited to be together finally! Besides the joy of having Travis home, this whole event has taught me a lot of myself and my relationship with God and I wanted to share a little about this journey and how God has taught me about patience and his timing. As a side note, I am sure most know this about me but I have had my life planned out since I was 10, I knew I wanted to be a lawyer, and I knew I wanted to help people. Once I met Travis, I started planning our life out too. We were gonna live in Athens, and I was going to work at a nearby Public Defender Office and Travis was going to work for UGA once he finished his PhD. After living in Athens a few more years, we were going to move to Tallahassee so we could be near family and Travis could work at FSU. Don't you see? It was the perfect plan! So when I wasn't getting any offers from the firms I was interviewing with, I started to panic because "my plan" was not going as planned. Because of this I was constantly questioning God and having numerous self pity parties because everyone else got to live with their husbands and I should too and blah blah blah...waaaahhhh wahhh wahhh (it is embarrassing how much I complained). I am sure that during all my self pity prayers God probably wanted to smack me around a little and tell me to stop complaining and whining but as usual he was gentle and comforting. My friends probably wanted to smack me too...I am sure I was annoying with all my complaining but they are good friends and didn't hit me once.
Ok so on to the story:
One night at the beginning of November, I had fallen asleep and was awaken by my phone ringing. I saw that it was Travis, quickly answered and told him I was asleep and I'd call him in the morning, I was about to hang up the phone until he said wait I really need to talk to you. Little did I know that the news he was about to share would change everything. I am fully awake by now and Travis tells me that his dad offered him a job and wanted him to come work with him here in Moultrie. Now yall can only imagine how in shock I was when I hear this- I mean total shock. I remember thinking, surely this must be a joke. Travis told me he had been praying for a long time now that God would show him what to do so that we would be together and that he felt at peace about this decision. Now let me add that we have been praying for over a year that Travis and I would finally be able to live in the same city but I never, I repeat never, did we think that God would answer that prayer by bringing Travis here. I always thought that it meant that I would finally get a job in or near Athens. However, God had a completely different plan and what a plan it was!! I was so ecstatic and excited that he was moving home that I felt like I was floating on air. The fact that I was going to actually be able to live with my husband was crazy to me! I just couldn't wait until he could finally move here on December 15th! My heart was finally at ease and I feel like God was telling me that this was all in his perfect timing. It reminded me that no matter how much I questioned God and asked him why this was happening to us, why wasn't I able to get a job closer to Athens that he was trying to teach me patience and not to worry because everything was in his hands.
I felt propelled to write about this because I know that others must feel like this too. Other must worry and get anxious about things that life throws at them and wonder why God is letting this happen or that happen. Since I have moved to Moultrie, time after time I have gotten upset and wondered why God didn't bless me with the job I wanted in Athens or the one I applied for in Atlanta. Over and over again I would question God. I remember Travis telling me one night after my usual self pity rant, "Brooklyn, quit questioning God's motives, quit asking why this and why that, you will drive yourself crazy. You won't understand why we are apart or why you didn't get an offer from the firm you wanted until it finally happens." He could not have been more right! It wasn't until Travis told me that he was moving home that I could really understand this. I finally realized that I didn't get those jobs because God's plan was for Travis to come back home. Now let me be clear, this was never our plan! I never imagined we would be in Moultrie. But since I have moved here I kept feeling like there was a reason God put me here. Finally it is clear, Travis would have never taken this job with his dad if I had gotten any of the jobs I wanted in Atlanta. He would still be unhappily plodding along with his PhD. I am writing about this to remind others, but mostly myself, that God's timing and his plan is perfect and his way is so much better than any plan we could have come up with ourselves. I constantly struggle with releasing my ways, plans and ideas to God's way. However, I constantly remind myself that His way is so much more awesome than anything I, we, could have ever planned. Lastly, I want to note that along with patience God has reminded me that complaining is useless and spirit crushing! Now don't get me wrong, I am a complainer and I still catch myself complaining but I've noticed that when I stop complaining I feel soooo much better. Complaining brings others down too- and no one wants to be the reason other people feel bad. Plus nobody, and I mean nobody likes a complainer :)
Below is an awesome video featuring Joyce Meyer and her sermon about patience and the attitude you should have while you are waiting.
Joyce Meyer, Patience
